"NO unsolicited queries...!"

I'm sure I've ranted about this before... but when agents say this, how the hell do they obtain new clients then?

Or do they want to obtain new clients?

I can't see why they wouldn't (unless they're allergic to money).

The only reason I can see agents not wanting to take on new clients is if: a.) they have a small stable of really high-profile clients and it's a strain to pamper all those diva personalities, or b.) if they have a huge stable of nobody clients and they are burning the candle at both ends trying to turn those clients into somebodies in order to make a name for themselves.

Other than that when an agent says, "I'm not accepting any new clients" I tend to think of it as a ruse. They are either sick of reading queries (and sifting through a slush pile... Even though both might contain the next Stephen King) or just don't want to let anyone new into the boy's club of professional writers.

But my other question is: if agents don't accept unsolicited material, then how the hell do you get access to them?

I'm assuming you just have to be great at self-promotion and they have to notice your blog, or see one of your stories in a magazine or see your name amongst the semi-finalists at a film festival or screenplay competition.

I really don't know...

But here I go... With no highfalutin education (just a liberal arts undergrad and grad school degree in education) under my belt and no great connections, nepotism or ins to speak of...

It's getting tiresome dealing with the ever-present catch-22 I run into: The "if you were worth a damn, you'd already be a famous writer" malarkey.
See, everyone wants you to have a proven track record as a writer, but nobody wants to take a chance and give you your first shot.
I guess they don't see the inherit contradiction therein.
I ran into the same thing when I began searching for teaching jobs.

*sigh*

Here goes everything...